Ps. 124:7
(This is my favorite verse from one of my favorite psalms. I hope you'll read the whole thing!)
I coordinated a wedding for some friends yesterday. So in this week that was consumed with wedding prep, my thoughts were naturally along the vein of what marriage means and what a wedding day represents. Here are a few fragments of those thoughts.
First, we don't outgrow our need for help. My little son doesn't say words yet, but his requests for help are nonetheless obvious and immediate and I'm accustomed to responding to them. He wants milk or blueberries, he wants a toy that he can't reach, he wants to be up on a chair, he wants a closed door opened or an open door closed. He makes these desires known and I'm constantly saying, "Just a minute, Henry, and I'll help you." I'm perpetually on-call to help this little boy. The assistance I give daily to my toddler is practice for the help needed by every person I encounter. Some help is spontaneous, some is planned. In the case of organizing and executing a wedding ceremony and reception, the help is definitely planned. I had the unusual privilege, for a wedding coordinator, of being colleagues with the best man, the sound tech and emcee, and one of the bridesmaids. We all work the same summer schedule, so the first hour or so of every workday this week was devoted to wedding conversation as we helped our friends iron out the details of their day. Without intending to sound boastful, I can confidently say that without the help of this small band of people, the bride and groom would have found the day confusing and stressful. With our help, though, I watched them enjoy the day and feel at ease in the knowledge that all the details, big and small, were in capable hands.
Second, no bride and no groom are ever ready for marriage. I thought back to my own wedding day a lot this week and remember it with fondness. It was a beautiful, happy day and a joyful beginning. But the woman I was then, the man my husband was... that couple was a pair of mere saplings. Since then we have weathered winters, flourished in summertimes, and changed in autumns. We could not have guessed the way our days would unfold and the ways we'd need each other in the years since then. Sharing a life is far more difficult than any wedding-day couple knows. My prayers for this couple - and all couples that I watch taking wedding vows - are for humility, abundant kindness, and a heart ready to sacrifice. That's what marriage takes.
Third, the day of a wedding, when your friends and relatives are all in one place and all celebrating YOU, represents a scaffolding that will be there to support you for the rest of your lives. You will probably never again see all of these people in the same room. But notice their faces. Remember their names. Keep that seating chart handy and when you need help, these are the people you can call. These people made pies for your reception, picked flowers for your bouquets, cleaned up the sanctuary while you went to the park for photos, designed your wedding program, and collected tulle and Christmas lights from reception hall while you were honeymoon-bound. They love you. They care about your marriage. When things fall apart - which they always do, one way or another - these are the people who will help you put the pieces back together.
When the bubbles all pop at the end of a wedding day, when the honeymoon ends and you're in your first apartment together making dinner and looking at a stack of bills and making hard decisions, you might feel alone. You might want that wedding day coordinating team back. But the truth is that every marriage - even the best ones - need help. Marriages change and mature and grow. And you have a big backup team that is cheering for you. Don't try to do it alone.
Grateful this week for:
wineberries
watching Henry's hands holding legos
nail polish
having two vehicles
an orderly list
pickles
quiet mornings
porch swing
the moment when the bride finally walked down the aisle
No comments:
Post a Comment