Community: Oct 26 - Nov 1

Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also the interests of others. Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus. 
Phil. 2:4-5

[If you're following along with my reading plan, you know this wasn't part of this week's reading. I went off the plan and read Philippians 2:1-11 this week instead of the John passage.]

Confession: I'm not great with people. I value people and enjoy close friendships, but when it comes to crowds, I get tongue-tied and easily overwhelmed. So after muddling through group gatherings every evening this week, my crowd-shy self is seeking some alone time.

As a lifelong introvert, I'm sometimes guilty of longing for solitude too much. But you don't have to read more than a page or two into the Bible before you see that being alone is not what we were made for. We were made for shared life, for community living, for giving and receiving kindnesses.  And community doesn't just come into play at the women's social or on Small Group nights. Shared living doesn't only occur when a family with a new baby needs meals or when friends buy a house and need help carrying furniture. Rolling through life alongside others is part of God's design. It's why He gave us families and churches and spent so much time giving commands for how to interact with others.  

God knows that focusing on others squashes self-centeredness. Every moment of the day, I'm swirling in my own thoughts: "what's for dinner, did I send that email, I should dust the living room again, I think I'm getting a cold, I wish I had time to repaint my fingernails, I hope Henry has a good nap, did I leave that window open?" So when I hear from others about shopping trips, TV shows, baking disasters, child-rearing struggles, and and fashion shortcuts, I'm reminded that my experiences in life are limited. The content doesn't need to be profound to knock me out of my own internal monologue and into the reality of what other people are living.

Better yet, when I open my home - and my heart - to the ordinary and imperfect lives of others, I find that they are just as needy as I always feel and that we can encourage each other simply by sharing an evening together. Welcoming others and finding ways to serve them allows me a taste of Jesus's own ministry of self-sacrifice. I don't think I'm particularly gifted at showing hospitality, but sharing the simple gift of an open heart is easy. And the reward might be more than just friendship. Being open to people means that God can use them in my life too. So hosting a meal might lead to a new job. Or a cup of coffee could lead to a brand-new ministry. It's almost always through other people that God accomplishes His work among us. Could something amazing start with my act of kindness to someone this week?

Sharing life becomes easier - even for an introvert - when we plant relationships in the soil of prayer. In the last year or two, I've come to realize that prayer (which might just look like sitting) is actually the most powerful thing I can do. Taking my concerns and the needs of others to the Lord in prayer brings peace, confidence, and hope. Creating a habit of praying for the people who are sharing my road through life isn't just an opportunity to see God bring answers. It also brings me closer to them as my heart begins to grow around their lives. It's harder to stay focused on myself when I'm daily thinking about how I can lift others up in prayer.

I am surrounded by examples of this shared living and it's changing how I look at life. My sister-in-law texts me from the grocery store to ask if I need anything. A friend checks in with me on Sunday about birthday cards we discussed on Wednesday. Everybody at Small Group kindly eats slices of a yummy, but horribly deformed, apple cake I baked. A colleague who traveled to Peru for a wedding comes back with a pair gloves for me. Life lived with a thought for others, rather than lived circling my own self, is richer and broader and stronger. When we give, we gain. When we share, we grow. It's a principle I want to teach my son, and it's one I want to live out more fully myself. If I give in too often to my preference for alone time, I'm missing the wonderful gift of a life shared with others. I was made for it. And I'm learning to embrace it.