Ps. 119: 45
MONDAY
Remember when you were a kid and you were just itching for a snow day? Or a delay? Or an early dismissal? It's magical. It's exciting. It's edge-of-your-seat drama. But when you work the front desk at a school, it's none of this. It's exhausting. It's busy. It's phone-ringing-of-the-hook drama. Today was one of these days.
Since we're a private school, we receive kids from about 14 districts. If they call an early dismissal - or a morning delay - the kids in that district are transported by bus on that district's schedule. Today at 9:00 one of our schools called an early dismissal. We were hoping it would only be that one and we could proceed as normal for the rest of the day. No such luck. One by one, all of our schools (except one) called early dismissals and gave us their dismissal times, which were stretched over a two-hour period.
Then parents started calling. "When will my child be dismissed?" "I was going to pick her up. Should I still do that?" "Can you tell my kids to be sure to get on the bus?" "What about the basketball game tonight?" "Will there still be play practice?" We've had enough practice at this that we are able to answer most questions. And they're valid, understandable questions! But it's wearying.
The irony today was that there wasn't a flake of snow in sight. Or a drop of rain. Temperatures were really low and freezing rain was predicted for the afternoon, but it's a little humorous to dismiss a whole school full of kids not into a blizzard, or even the beginnings of a blizzard, but into... a cold and gloomy February day.
My husband - who's retained more 'kid' than I have - thought today's dismissal was wonderful. And a coworker thought the "command central" of the office was awesome. In a way, they're both right. A change in the normal routine is refreshing, even if it means answering the phone every 30 seconds and setting aside my to-do list for the day to manage the closings. On days like this one, I can handle the whirlwind gracefully and with an eye to eternity, or I can become consumed by the whirlwind and completely lose focus. It's a choice every day, but more noticeably on days when things seem out of control. The truth is, every day is wildly out of control - out of my control, anyway - and only being at peace with the One who is in control makes it possible to find the magic in any ordinary day.
WEDNESDAY
I've been reading When People are Big and God is Small, which we will hopefully be doing in my Bible Study sometime in the next year or so. The chapter on "growing in the fear of the Lord" suggests reading regularly the last few chapters of Job. "It is a speech intended to cause Job to grow even more in knowing God's greatness. If you read these chapters every day for a month you will find that they are a treatment for almost anything." I have been reading them for 3 days, and this is already true. My heart is so humbled to think on the greatness of God and it really changes my perspective on things when I consider the absolute control God has over everything. Who am I to question him? To try to turn things in my favor? To complain? To be annoyed? It's humbling, but not depressing. I feel awed at God's power and grateful to be in His hands. Add Job 38-41 to your devotions this week. It's pretty powerful.
THURSDAY
When I was a little girl, my dad would bring home a special Valentine's Day gift for my sister and me every year, nearly always a stuffed animal. I had a stash of pink, white, and red critters and the new bear or monkey or rabbit was added delightfully to the collection. The dead-center of February, the dead-center of a cold winter, was warm and bright and cheerful in the supermarket aisles of shimmery pink and glimmery red. By middle school, I had made a tradition of wearing red and pink every day from
February 1st through the 14th. I didn't have a boyfriend, but I didn't need one. I was blissfully happy with Valentine's Day as a single girl, drenched in sappiness and not the least bit embarrassed about it. Valentine's Days while I was in college cemented the day as my favorite holiday. On February 14th of my freshman year, the boys who lived on the top floor of my building bought a rose for each of the girls on the other three floors. The next year on Valentine's Day, snow blanketed the campus forcing an unprecedented cancellation of all classes. I spent the next Valentine's Day in Oxford, England with a houseful of American students. We made a fantastic feast, topped off by layered chocolate heart-shaped brownie cakes and chocolate covered strawberries, and the next day some of us left for a weekend in Rome.
By the next Valentine's Day, I had met my true love (who is now my husband) and though this should have been the Valentine's Day I'd been waiting for all my life, the glow of a blossoming genuine love had dimmed the shimmer I'd found in all the Valentine's Days that had gone before. When it was just me and my candy heart earrings and my girlfriends and my glittery garlands and chocolates and stuffed animals, falling in love with love was easy. When February 14th - or any day of the year - brought the reality of a serious relationship, none of that glitzy stuff meant anything. It didn't work anymore. Though I kept decorating and pulling out my collection of Valentine's socks each winter, the excitement had worn off. I suppose it's the same phenomenon that causes the drive to the beach to actually be more exciting than the vacation week itself, or the anticipation of Christmas morning to be more magical than those few hours ever actually are. I'd been glorifying "love" for all those years, and now here it was. Not a let-down, just the end of the anticipation.
Since then, for the past 6 Valentine's Days, there's been less pink, fewer decorations, and a decreasing collection of heart earrings in my jewelry box. This year I got out my box of Valentine's Day decorations, but couldn't bring myself to put any of them up. I've outgrown them. I made some simple heart garlands out of scrapbook paper in deep reds and browns instead. Grown-up V-day decorations. I miss the glitz a little bit, but it's been replaced by the deep and lasting love of a committed husband. That's something you can't box up with chocolate truffles, can't put on a conversation heart, can't spell out with x's and o's. And finally, I'm OK with that.
FRIDAY
Valentine's present from my love.
And I got him a 1-gallon jar of dill pickles.
That's true love.
SATURDAY
I spent the whole day baking. Creme brulee first, which had to chill for 6 hours, then a devil's food cake with strawberry cream filling, chocolate ganache, and chocolate curls. I'm not really good at this kind of thing - I'm not a chef - but it completely absorbed me all day. (Along with Love Songs Radio on Pandora.) Life's not about me and what satisfies or fulfills me, so I want to be really careful not to go in that direction. But I was very content spending the whole day in the kitchen and when I served the desserts at our Brother Sister Valentine's Dinner (with Pete and his three brothers, and all four wives) I felt reassured that my day had been well-spent. Even though the creme brulee was a little runny and the cake was a little dry.
Pete spent the day working with his brother and dad on the new bathroom. Progress is slow, but steady. I love what's happening up there and I'm so excited for the finished project!
SUNDAY
Sick mama and sick baby boy today. Skipped church, wiped runny noses (mine and his) all day, and snuggled for the three hymns (instead of the usual one) before bedtime. Glad the weekend's extended by one day this time. Thank you, Lord, for Presidents Day.
Grateful this week for:
kitchen counter lamp
2 hour delay
H's attempts with a fork!
eggs and sweet potato hashbrowns
errands with my boys
birds in winter
emoji texts
wooden animal toys
nail makeover
pink
chocolate
sappy love songs
coworkers who are friends
sunshine
orchid
Peter
baking
Charlotte snuggles
three bonus sisters
snow plows and salt trucks
smile cheeks
avocado and oatmeal facial mask
2nd cup of coffee
honesty
hymns
leftover stromboli
PS: A couple new recipes will be posting here in the next week or so.
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